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Throw me your best dad jokes!

ssjg5rlly

5 months ago

Yes, yes. I will give them back. I'm a good boy!

Comments

  • 5 months ago
  • 5 points

Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you.. You have my word!

I like telling Dad jokes. Sometimes he laughs.

  • 5 months ago
  • 4 points

Hi 'a good boy', I'm dad.

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

I was waiting for this.

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

Hi 'was waiting for this', I'm dad.

Once I start, I can not stop the dad jokes.

  • 5 months ago
  • 4 points

There were two muffins in an oven. One of them said "Hi!"
The other said "Ah! A talking muffin!"

What do you call a store that doesn't like to wear clothes?
A strip mall.

  • 5 months ago
  • 4 points

my friend told that first joke in front of my whole school. it was so cringy.

  • 5 months ago
  • 4 points

My therapist told me that I should visit Korea. I guess she thinks I need to do some Seoul searching.

  • 5 months ago
  • 4 points

So a guy walks into the Bar...

I assume it hurt

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

or similarly: two guys walked into a bar, i would have thought the second guy saw the first

  • 5 months ago
  • 4 points

Did you know French fries aren't cooked in France? They're cooked in Greece.

  • 5 months ago
  • 4 points

I'm half french and half greek...I'm a freak!

  • 5 months ago
  • 3 points

Dad jokes are known to the state of California to cause cancer and birth defects

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

"proposition 65 intensifies"

  • 5 months ago
  • 1 point

as does about everything that is not a vegetable in California.

  • 5 months ago
  • 1 point

Well yeah, all they it is 100% organic, gluten free, dairy free, soy free, kale that has been processed through 100 tests for bacteria, disease, etc.

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

I can't really "throw" you a joke, can I?

Here... catch!

That was two.

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

crumples "your best dad jokes!" into a ball

throws it across the room

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

A guy walks into the bar of a restaurant and goes to the bartender and asks "how much for a beer?" The bartender replies "$1". The customer completely amazed, orders a beer. Its the best he's ever tasted. He then asks the bartender "Well then how much for a bottle of wine?" The Bartender reply's "50 cents". The guy still amazed then orders it and it's the best he's ever tasted. He says "Wow, this place is amazing, I really wish I could meet the owner of this place". The bartender then says "Oh well, he's upstairs in his office with my wife". The guy looks all confused then asks "What is he doing upstairs in his office with your wife?" The bartender then says "The same thing I'm doing to his business

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

This is both funny and wrong at the same time...

  • 5 months ago
  • 1 point

Imagine coming back from the cigar store in reasonable time

  • 5 months ago
  • 1 point

I'm still waiting my mine to come home from getting a pack of cigarettes 15 years ago.

  • 5 months ago
  • 4 points

Mine went out for milk 15 years ago as well. He came back about 30 minutes later and has been my father ever since.

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

not gonna lie, they had us in the first half

  • 5 months ago
  • 2 points

You've really got me torn with this one. Did your dad go get you milk 15 years ago and continue to be your dad ever since or did some random guy bring you milk 15 years ago and you promoted him to the rank of dad, where he has served ever since?

  • 5 months ago
  • 1 point

Oh my gosh

  • 5 months ago
  • 1 point

I thought the exact same thing

[comment deleted]

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